I’ve been exhausted. After over a year of working a job I don’t care for, but should be thankful to have, and working on sketches that have yet to be posted anywhere, I have decided to return here. I respect my co-workers, but they typically have the most boring conversations in the world and I need to vent about more interesting issues. That said, I never really left intentionally; I got caught up in other projects and my aforementioned job. Time moves too quickly these days. Though I’ll be back here on a consistent basis, Alex will be working on his blog over at Mancouch because they actually pay him. This may end up on there as well, but that’s not important at the moment.
So, it’s been a year, there is much to talk about. Let us pray.
- Inglorious Basterds– sucked. I have never in my entire life of watching pretentious movies seen a movie worse than this. The constant thought streaming through my mind as I watched Nazis, American GIs and French folk sit at tables speaking incessantly was that someone forgot to remind Tarantino that second drafts are not only customary, but a great way to remove unnecessary dialogue and details. I understand that quick dialogue and style over substance are Tarantino’s trademarks (I do own and enjoy the majority of his work) but this film merely impersonated style. When a movie is at least in part supposed to be about a group of Nazi murdering Jewish-American misfits, I would have liked to see them do something, instead of being told about it in passing. That and its ridiculous juxtaposition to what should have been a heart wrenching story of the Nazi occupation of France exemplify the film’s greatest failure: tone. I would have liked to have seen the rip roaring adventure portrayed in the trailers. I didn’t. I would have liked to have seen a drama about the occupation of France. I almost did, but Brad Pitt doing an irritating accent interrupted it constantly. Ultimately, what I ended up seeing was about 5 characters over what felt like 6 hours, none of whom I gave half a shit about. This was capped of by an awkward revenge fantasy where the guy who directed Cabin Fever was crying and had a punch-gun. Actually, the punch-gun was one of the few things I liked. I know at least half of the people reading this disagree with me, and were pulling hard for the Oscar, but I can’t fathom it. I try to be even-handed with things like this but holy shit, Inglorious Basterds was horrible. Seriously, this is the first time I don’t even want to hear a counter argument. I know that is bad form for a blog like this, but really, I get extremely agitated thinking about this movie. It was shit; it hurts my brain that people liked it. And you can’t be mad anyway, Kathryn Bigelow won! SUCK IT JAMES…sorry, I really liked The Hurt Locker. Speaking of James…
- Avatar: The Highest Grossing Film of All Time- Haha, that giant cat just threw a six foot long spear.
- Frank Turner- put out my favorite album of last year, Poetry of the Deed. This, and much of Turner’s other work, exposes the insecurities of those who call themselves artists and the emotions of realizing that your punk rock rebellion is not what it once was when you were 16. All this without surrendering to the ridiculous idea that it was never worth it. For those of us who begin to doubt our dreams, Turner will remind you that Punk Rock can still save your life.
- Lady GaGa- yes, Lady GaGa. I don’t love her records, some of them I down right despise, but she represents something good. It is nice to see a figure in pop that survives on basic, radio friendly music and makes headlines by having fun with her fame. In a media that now thinks that Green Day have had some sort of important social impact and should be hailed for their political views, I turn to Lady GaGa to save our youth. I think we would all love to be famous and stay that way by messing with people who don’t get the joke. I get the joke Stefani, please don’t stop.
- Wisconsin- I recently went to Wisconsin. Spring Green specifically. *SPRING GREEN IN THE HOOOOOUSE*. Sorry. So anyway, on our nearly four hour drive to Spring Green, I discovered that I really had no idea what farms looked like. I mean, there was nothing out there. We went through Madison, the capitol, and it looked less populated than Paramus, New Jersey. And I’m not insulting Wisconsin, the people were nice and the food was good, but holy shit, I could never live there. Plus, I was kind of scared that I was going to have to fight off a family of cannibals.
Okay, that’s enough for now. I promise something more well conceived next time; I’m just getting back into rhythm.
Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition.